MAE.

More things I’ve learned:

• the hose next to the toilet is USED in place of toilet paper, duh. for like a whole week I thought it was to hose off your feet or something
• beggar follow up: beggars are woman with babies, old ladies or kids and they LOVE white girls, like me. they have been seen to dodge other cars to get to our car —
• today this little boy came up to our car window with the sweetest smile in the whole-wide-world sang me a counting song…or maybe a song about pens, or maybe something just so damn cute in Hindi, but it was so cute I gave him 10 rupees and then he gave me a pen! win for both of us!
• I am …sort of tired of eating Indian food. Spice for breakfast is a lot. I’m used to waffles with a cup of syrup, a doughnut or sweet, vanilla yogurt with a pound of vanilla granola, spice in the a.m. is becoming really difficult 
• today I ate Cinnabon at a mall! and it 100% tasted like Cinnabon!
• India has been really great, but I will say 60% of my time has felt like it was in a car.. It takes FOR-EVER to get anywhere
• also guys in Hyderabad hold hands everywhere, not as much in Dehli .. I haven’t seen this behavior among women
• also, haven’t seen any cows or oxes in Dehli — but tons of dogs and 1 cat

Today we arrived in Dehli, which is like Washington D.C. and Hyderabad, where we were is like Atlanta — says Sundeep. I say “like” lightly. They aren’t really “like,” but if we were to compare them…we also presume Bombay is comparable to NYC or LA. Also the Taj Mahal is NOT in Dehli, as I thought — its 4 HOURS away from Dehli. Poor geography, more stories about the Taj tomorrow.

My 2012 favorite thing so far…. is lemonade. I want it morning, noon and night. It’s January — lemonade? Yes. 

Also my 2012 favorite thing is asking Sundeep what things India has….

Sundeep…does India have couches?

Sundeep…does India have peanut butter?

Sundeep…does India have lemonade?

T-24 hours. Very excited, very nervous. Details to come!

With our impending 24 hour voyage to the motherland, here are a few “must-have” British Airways items:

 

Currently our bedroom has two nightstands, which are bulky, really heavy and do not fit into the new dig.

December 2011 is going to be remodel as much of the apartment as you can before you become manager (…..details to come), start classes and begin planning some seriously, fun sister-of-the-bride events!

I picked out three. One is more of an unrealistic item from Restoration Hardware, the price-tag will not be published due to the embarrassment of a nightstand even costing that.

Contestants:

West Elm. $129

— kind of bulky

— eclectic, love the shape

— unsure of what it would look like on taupe carpet

— no drawer space, which may be a benefit (clutter usually occupies that space)

CB2. $149.

— love the steel

— has a drawer

— Sundeep is a little over the steel, drab theme I have going on currently

— would it go with this

<drumroll> My favorite, and super overpriced love affair

Restoration Hardware.

It’s borderline dumpster dive meets trendy loft space, right? I’m obsessed.

is almost here, and I absolutely cannot wait!

As an old, married lady with my first “real” holiday away from my family, I am obsessed with starting new traditions.  

I am also obsessed with making a turkey …

BUT.

1) I have no turkey baster, 2) no internal thermometer, and 3) have never made nor watched anyone make a turkey in my life. Which is perfect, because turkeys seem super easy to make.  <cue: Griswald Family Christmas>

On my search for the perfect turkey recipe I found this one.

and, what is a holiday without a special drink:

Hot apple brandy cider.

I love the holidays. Any favorite traditions out there? 

Babies.

Of course, I love them; often joke about having 20 of them, but lately have been a little more serious about them —

This is not a “surprise — we’re trying to have a baby!” post to all my friends — ew. awkward. makes me want to throw up a little.

This is more of an acknowledgement that more of my friends are talkin’ babies, logistics, timing, etc. I have honestly wanted to post about this for awhile, but was afraid that it was a bit too much for people or myself, definitely myself.

True confession: I went to a new gynecologist in September, and told her I wanted to be pregnant in a year (…guess I’ll tell Sundeep when I get home…). Researched her prior to going, had references/her bio … I mean c’mon, this lady is going to see a LOT of my shit, she better be good.

Sundeep and I have talked about expanding our family, both wanting a larger family, and not wanting to wait until we were in our mid-30s to start. Not that I have huge reservations about starting in my 30’s, but we are both are great places, are financially stable, want a larger family —- why not start sooner than later?

ANYWAYS, I went to Dr. Tan. This super adorable middle-aged woman — who I am now officially obsessed with. She has delivered two of my friends babies, was the best GYN I had ever seen, and…. is married to an Indian guy and said “..hybrid babies have the best genes…” Which basically made my ovaries explode.

ANYWAYS. This is what the baby doc appointment entailed:

1. She tested me for cystic fibrosis. Had no idea this was even a concern, but said she generally always tests Caucasian females — if I was positive she would test my husband. Once I said my husband isn’t Caucasian (insert — “my husband is Indian too!”) I learned our chances of producing a baby who was positive was almost next to negative;  Asian people —- don’t have to worry about CF, whew.

2. She tested me for CMV (cytomegalovirus). Working in the hospital, and all of its disgusting bugs she wanted to make sure I didn’t have it. Results: I have been exposed to CMV, but am now immune to it, meaning been exposed — immune system attacked it — done. and done. future fetus will not get it, because my body has proved it can fight it.

3. She said for a woman with a regular cycle (28-35 days) have sex every other day from day 10-22. Not every day because it becomes shitty, tired sperm; every other day tends to be a “fresher batch.” <barf> 

4. She gave me 25 different types of prenatal vitamins; prenatal vitamins are HUGE in size and make me nauseous.

5. Told me to avoid more than 8 oz of caffeine/day in preparation of pregnancy. There is a correlation between caffeine and miscarriage.

6. Avoid fish high in mercury (swordfish, shark, mackerel and sushi).

7. Start pilates. She swears woman who do pilates have easier childbirths. AMEN. Spread the word — pilates strengthens your core = strong abdominal muscles for pushing. She also said woman who do pilates tend to rebound back to their normal bodies sooner.

Now. Of course I came with questions.

1. If I get pregnant — when should I call you?

Dr. Tan wants you to come in for a blood hcg (hcg is a hormone secreted when the embryo burrows in the uterine lining) AFTER I take a home ++ pregnancy test.

2. When would I come back after the blood test?

If I did not have IVF or fertility treatment (aka normal, old fashioned pregnancy) come in 9 weeks after ++ hcg test for the first ultrasound (aka is there a heartbeat?)

3. How long should we try before I come to you for further assistance?

6 months — kind of gasped. 6 months! That’s only 6 periods. I have heard variations of the “when to escalate” protocol. Generally, 1 year. Although, at 6 months without a successful positive pregnancy test, she does a sperm count test (—cum in a cup! haaaaaaaaeyyyyy) and a tube check (insert a catheter into the vag — shoot dye into the fallopian tubes — does the dye flush through the tubes to the ovary? —> are their blockages? is it a clear path?)

This really was my focus question, of course, typical ..planning life’s next steps is my forte. I have amazing girlfriends, who have had the unfortunate curses of lady problems and conceiving woes — 6 months, a year … more than a year goes by no babes. I find conception insane, how does this really happen anyways?

I recently had the unfortunate/fortunate pleasure of attending a second, pregnancy ultrasound with my great friend, Katie. Katie is 31, has had insane problems getting pregnant — has really bad eggs (WHO F* KNEW! all those years of great sex in college + post-college, marriage …and you had really bad EGGS all THE FUCKING LONG, no one told you!). Anyways, after almost 10 IVF (LITERALLY, taking sperm and putting them in eggs = embryo) implantations — none of them GAVE. This past summer she found out she was pregnant. The second ultrasound appointment her husband had to take a rain-check due to a mandatory meeting with the mayor (legit), so she asked me to go with her. (AMAZING — did she know I secretly loved her baby-tales and watched every Baby Story in college?) We went into the office, she undressed (we’re nurses so being naked in front of anything/anyone is absolutely not a big deal), got up into the stirrups, Dr. Tan (that’s right…my new BFFAE) waved the ultrasound around in her vagina — trying to get a picture of the embryo’s heart beating nice and fast —- and after what felt like 3 hours of silence, there was no heartbeat. The embryo, massive amount of cells, their final hopes — had “collapsed into her lining,” resulting in no heartbeat, no baby, nada. I still can’t imagine what she was going through, and I don’t mean to be selfish, but I wanted to cry (and did..) for days over how traumatic it was. Just the way Dr. Tan told her “it ceased to grow,” she needed to decide whether she wanted a D&C or misoprostol (abortion/miscarriage pill — you take it, it induces pseudo-contractions and you expel the embryo). Anyways, LONG, long traumatic story later, I feel like getting pregnant is a lot of work — and while I have understood the toll of sex for almost 10 years, I never really comprehended the emotional toll of pregnancy — and what getting there may entail.

Is anyone ever really ready for how easy or hard getting pregnant is? I don’t think I am. I feel like it’s an emotional roller coaster — and I want to be 800% ready for whatever it brings me, which prompted my appointment and q&a with Dr. Tan.

NOW. this post was OOOBER TMI and makes me a little squirmish reading through. Nonetheless, one day baby Malladi will make their way into the world and I’m looking forward to the journey he/she gives us.

Whew.

Get out your diyas, and make way for my girl — Lakshmi.

Come on over Lakshmi, my house is clean and the evil spirits are gone! 

New things I would like today:

This fabulous animal print blouse (shocking! here we go with the animal print again!)

And, of course this adorb scarf that engulfs the entire upper half of my body.

Happy Diwali my sweet friends and family, xo.